What's My Name?

What the hell is wrong with me? I'm not who I want to be

I tired spot cream an' I tried it all I'm crawling up the wall!

What's my name naaaame...naaaame....naaaame....

I tried to join a ping-pong club, sign on the door said all full up!

I got nicked, fighting in the road an' the judge didn't even know

What's my name

Dad go pissed so I got clocked

Couldn't hear the Tannoy so he lost the lot

Offers Mum a bribe through the letter box

Drives you fucking mad

Now I'm round the back of your house at night

Peeping in the window - are you sleeping tight?

I laugh at your locks with my celloid strip

An' you won't know who came

What's my name