To Say The Very Least

More often a novel

What's word's owning is worth fighting for

whether it be life, love or the pursuit of happiness

mom's apple-pie

or even something as basic as sex

and don't go knocking it

that three-letter-word makes a mockery

of the four-letter-onces that tries to cheapen it

It's a wonderful game for people of all ages

and even for losers it's worth a try

That's good morning and good bye

They sit in your section

they think you gentle and nice

you bring glasses of water

with lentils and rice

Old-fashioned outfits

it also appears

their tips are greater

when you don't wear brassieres

They give you their orders

and watch when you write them

wishing that you

could be their menu item

They wanna be breast-fed

the day you get work off

with you in their thoughts

they walk home and then jerk off

You look like a model

so young and intrepid

the regular customers

are old and decrepit

The food is here rotten

but the service is stellar

I know that I love her

and I wish I could tell her

But they don't know your name

cause you don't really care

as long as they tip you

and stay in their chair

They swallow their tongues

in a venom, dirty wipers

if you tell them a lie

and changes the dirty diapers