Dead Finks Don't Talk

Oh cheeky cheeky

Oh naughty sneaky

You're so perceptive

And I wonder how you knew.

But dead finks don't walk too well (oh no)

A bad sense of direction (oh no)

And so they stumble round in threes (oh no)

Such a strange collection.

Oh, you headless chicken

Can those poor teeth take so much kicking?

You're always so charming

As you make your way up here.

And dead finks don't dress too well

No discrimination

To be a zombie all the time

Requires such dedication.

"Oh please sir, will you let it go by,

'Cos I failed both tests with my legs both tied

In my place the stuff is all there

I've been ever so sad for a very long time.

My my, they wanted the works:

Can you this? and that? I never got a letter back

More fool me, bless my soul

More fool me, bless my soul."

Oh perfect masters

They thrive on disasters

They all look so harmless

Till they find their way up here.

But dead finks don't talk too well

They've got a shaky sense of diction

It's not so much a living hell

It's just a dying fiction.