Big Daddy Vs. Dolemite

Mmm.. ohh yeah

Mmm, mmm, mmm, ohh yeah

Allow me to introduce myself

as the Big Daddy Kane

A smooth lover from around the way

that's bound to drive any bitch insane

Well Dolemite is my name

And rappin and tappin is my game

Oh yeah? Well me tell you somethin Mr. Dolemite

The shit you talkin years ago, I could see

But it's the 90's now and rap is all about me

Listen.. when it comes down to rappin

I was THROUGH with it before you learned what to do with it

I'm the KING so I'm stakin my claim

in the rappin game

Y'know? For all players, I am the speaker

I'm also known as the hot pussy seeker

When it comes down to ridin up and down in some pussy

I make it weaker

Also it gets a little deeper

I was walkin down Broadway the other day

An old old lady came my way

She said, "I'll be glad when you 'come 18

I'm gonna give you a funkin like you ain't never seen!"

I said, "LADY! Why wait for so much time to pass?

I've been WANTIN to tear up yo' old gray ass"

So I pulled out my dick

It was so shiny it looked like it was painted

The hoe took one look and damn near fainted

I stuck it in the bitch and the bitch began to shout

that, "Oh Mr. Dolemite, take that motherfucker OUT!"

Well you ain't sayin nothin slick to a can of oil

I walked barefoot from New York to Dallas

Won for Pimp of the Year at the Caesar's Palace

Made a big snowstorm on the 4th of July

And drunk the waters in the Atlantic Ocean til that shit was dry

I was makin money before Washington was put on a bill

And I kicked Jack's ass and took his hoe Jill

I'm the one who broke the bull's back

and made people say FUCK McDonald's and call ME the Big Mac

Why you long lanky motherfucker

You ain't nothin but a sucker!

I was born in a barrel of butcher knives

Shot in the ass with two Colt .45's

I've been slapped by a bear and bit by an eel

I chew up railroad iron, and shit out steel!

I jumped in the ocean and swallowed a whale

Handcuff lightning and throw THUNDER's ass in jail

Why you ignorant decrepit motherfucker

Let me tell you somethin

I'm the one that put the M in mackin

Because when you did it you was only actin

I made pimpin a full time job

so bitches wouldn't have to go out and rob

I made the streets of New York hot as a SAUNA

And hung a Home Sweet Hoe sign on every corner

Yes I'm the player of all players and the mack of all macks

Give a headache to Excedrin and knock the SHIT out of Ex-Lax

Why you insecure no business barn junkyard

rat soup eatin motherfucker!!

It was in the early 1960's when I originated my pimpin game

I was callin whores jives ass bitches

and pimps - sucker ass lame

KANE, before you can take my reign

You gotta cook me a chicken and a half a day

Walk from New York to Los Angeles and throw the bones away

You gotta be BORN BLIND and cannot see

Yo' bitches have the POCKS in the ass so bad they can't even pee

Ride a bald eagle a million feet in the AIR

And get out and do the runnin man while you up there

Have the Mumps and the Asiastic Flu

And the Crabs around yo' ass start singin the Yankee Doodle Doo!

Aww fuckit I give up