The Night Before The Funeral

The night before the funeral, I got some.

I sneaked a young girl up the stairs and past my mum.

I took her clothes off and I played

with her bits and she did the same but

it took ages for me to come.

Too drunk and getting old

It was a lovely show for a god I don't believe in.

I couldn't sing a single note at the service.

When they did "How Great Thou Art"

all I could think of was my old LP. of hymns by Elvis.

There's no such thing as sin

I said to Laura, "I hope I know you forever and when I'm going,

I'm going the Viking way.

Lay me in a boat with my favourite things

and set me on fire then send me on my way.

Kick me out to sea."

There's no such thing as sin