Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered

After one whole quart of brandy

Like a daisy, I'm awake

With no bromo-seltzer handy

I don't even shake

Men are not a new sensation

I've done pretty well I think

But this half-pint imitation

Put me on the blink

I'm wild again, beguiled again

A simpering, whimpering child again

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I

Couldn't sleep and wouldn't sleep

When love came and told me I shouldn't sleep

Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I

Lost my heart, but what of it

He is cold I agree

He can laugh, but I love it

Although the laugh's on me

I'll sing to him, each spring to him

And long for the day when I'll cling to him

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I

He's a fool and don't I know it

But a fool can have his charms

I'm in love and don't I show it

Like a babe in arms

Love's the same old sad sensation

Lately I've not slept a wink

Since this half-pint imitation

Put me on the blink

I've sinned a lot; I'm mean a lot

But I'm like sweet seventeen a lot

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I

I'll sing to him, each spring to him

And worship the trousers that cling to him

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I

When he talks, he is seeking

Words to get off his chest

Horizontally speaking, he's at his very best

Vexed again, perplexed again

Thank God, I can be oversexed again

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I

Wise at last, my eyes at last

Are cutting you down to your size at last

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered no more

Burned a lot, but learned a lot

And now you are broke, so you earned a lot

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered no more

Couldn't eat, was dyspeptic

Life was so hard to bear

Now my heart's antiseptic

Since you moved out of there

Romance, finis, your chance, finis

Those ants that invaded my pants, finis

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered no more