The Pristine Claw

Oh, to have a pristine claw

These hands are old and sore

The knuckles, they ache

The bones they do break

Oh, to have a youthful frown

Bleed on the surgeon's gown

Put plastic in me

I'm perfect you see

Don't look older than 43

But really I'm 70

Now run young man

And get my pills from the pharmacy

Rearrange my face for a hefty fee

I can't change the inside of me

I'm a vampire of the 21st century

Oh, to have a pristine claw

Marry the doctor when I'm poor

A face I can love

A cut that's above

If the aliens landed here

They'd see why we're so weird

We're destined to die

We're destined to die

Don't look older than 43

But really I'm 70

Now run young man

And get my pills from the pharmacy

Rearrange my face for a hefty fee

I can't change the inside of me

I'm a vampire of the 21st century

That's me, that's me, that's me, that's me

That's me, that's me, that's me, that's me

That's me, that's me, that's me, that's me